Title: Getting to Know Him
Author: Unicornpearlz
Fandom: Harry Potter: Prisoner of Azkaban
Rating: ?
Summary: After dating for a few months, Severus comes down ill. Remus is boggled, not by the cold, but by another mysterious stranger controlling Severus' thoughts.
Bunny: #4

Severus poured over the potions exams.  He had begun to feel worn down a few hours earlier, so he changed to test on the effects of gilly weed from a practical to written.  He sniffed and ran a hand through his silky black hair.  He marked Neville's paper with 95% and scrawled the foreboding statement: 'You're lucky it was written,' on the top. He couldn't comprehend how someone who was so good with herbology could be so bad at potions.  Had it been a practical exam, he knew Neville would have gotten a 'C' at best.  But, written, the kid was a wiz.

He sniffed and ran his hand through his hair again.  He looked at the clock – 5:30 – Remus was late.  A pang of fear shot through him.  Remus was never late. He stood up abruptly and fought against the dizziness that made him feel like clouds were closing in  around his eyes.  He rushed out the door, his teachers robes billowing behind him.

And, ran smack into Remus.

"Remus, are you all right?" he asked, his voice filled with concern.

Remus looked at him oddly.  "I'm fine, Severus.  Are you well?"  He and Severus had been an item for several months, but Severus had never shown an outward display of affection.  At least not outside the privacy of their own suites.

"Thank Merlin," Severus said as he hugged him closely.

As their bodies touched Remus heard him sniffle and felt heat radiating off his body.  Kissing him on the cheek, Remus led him back to the dungeon.

"Thank you for your concern.  I was speaking with young Mr. Longbottom, and lost track of time."  He tried not to show it, but he was worried.  He'd never seen Severus sick before, but knew one of Severus' worst fears was appearing weak, and couldn't imagine that he'd be an easy invalid.

The dungeon door had hardly closed behind them when Severus sneezed, "Hah-HRESSH!" Hug and wet, the sneeze exploded out of him.  He had been able to contain it in his sleeve, but it left him seeing stars. 

Remus noticed that he seemed unsteady and pushed him into the easy chair.   

"Thang you," Severus replied stuffily.  He pulled out his handkerchief and blew his nose forcefully.

"Why don't you get into bed?" Remus offered.

Severus shook his head.  "That's okay.  Dinner's in fifteen minutes, and I'm hungry."

Remus nodded.  He figured that would be best anyway.  If Severus was getting ill, than he may not have much of an appetite for much longer.  "Neville wants help with advanced herbology.  Do you mind if we use some of your supply?"

Severus thought about that.  He was very proud of his private supply.  And, he certainly didn't care to help Neville.  But, as he looked into Remus' eyes, he found himself quite unable to say no.  "Take what you need," he said, handing him over the key.  Quickly, he turned his head to the side.  "Hah-ARESSH!"

Remus pursed his lips together.  "Thank you, Sev."

At dinner Severus started to feel his cold settle into him.  He started suppressing a dry cough, but would staunchly refuse to admit that anything was wrong.

Remus kept close t him, which Severus appreciated.  For the first time in a long time he was starting to trust somebody.  He honestly felt safer when Remus was near.

About halfway through the meal, he felt a sneeze creeping up on him.  He bit his lip trying to keep himself from sneezing in front of the entire school.

Remus noticed immediately.  "Sev, are you all right?"

Severus watched as several pairs of eyes darted to him and then back to their plates.  He felt a flush rise in his cheeks.  'Why did Remus have to draw attention to me?  Why did he have to embarrass me like that?'

'Because he sees you as weak,' another voice in his head said.  It was low and sounded like it was hissing at him.  It was an old voice.  A familiar voice.  It sent a chill through his body.  'He's showing everybody your weaknesses.'

Severus shook his head to silence the voice, but Remus thought it was his answer.

"Come on," he said, quietly rising out of his chair. 

Severus followed in suit, his nose tickling more and more with every breath.  He blinked hard trying to get it to release, but it wouldn't.  His breath started coming in heavy gasps, and felt congestion settle in his sinuses.  The quickly exited the hall, and had just about made it to the doors when the sneezes struck.  "HarESH!! ESSHH! HAR-Ketchum!!"  The force of the sneezes doubled him over, and he grasped blindly for Remus.

Remus had his arm around his waste in an instant, and was pressing a fresh handkerchief into his hand.  "It's okay, Severus.  Just clear your mind," he whispered in a low voice, that only Severus could hear.

Remus' voice sounded so strong and stable, Severus couldn't help but listen to him.  When his head cleared, he took a deep breath.  There was no sound coming from around him, and all he could feel was Remus' proximity to his body.  Slowly, he opened his eyes.  The great hall was silent.  All eyes were on him, but no one dared to make a sound.  Severus froze.  He could hear them laughing at him.  He would hear about this for weeks to come.  He shifted his gaze to the Malfoy boy.  He sate still with a smug look on his face.  He looked at Remus, who was looking at the rest of the school with fire in his eyes – daring them to laugh.

'He set you up,' the snake like whisper said, 'Now, they've all seen you weak.  Leave with dignity, but don't forget this act of betrayal.'  With that the voice was gone.

No sooner had the door to the dungeon slammed shut than Severus whiled on Remus, his eyes smoldering with anger.  "How could you do that to me, Lupin?  How could you humiliate me like that?"

Remus sighed.  He figured that something like this was coming.  "I was trying to get you out of there before you sneezed," Remus reasoned.

Severus' eyes flared with anger.  "I can handle myself, thank you very much!"

"I know you can.  But, I wanted to help!"

Severus looked at him with disbelief.  'He thinks you're weak,' the voice told him.  "He just admitted it.  Eliminate him.'

"Some help you are!  Now, not only was I embarrassed, but everyone saw you being protective of me.  They're going to figure us out!"

"Is that a bad thing?" Remus asked.

Severus paused.  He wanted to yell out yes.  But, he didn't mean it.  "No," he said humbly.  He smothered a sneeze into his shoulder.

"Bless you," Remus said quietly.  "Come on.  To bed with you."

The next day, Severus had Minerva cover his classes for him, while he caught up on his sleep.  When he awoke, he heard someone in his herb closet.  Wand drawn his rushed in.  Just as he was about to call out expelliamus, he realized it was Remus. 

"Rem, what are you doing in here?" he yelled.

Remus was stunned.  "You told me I could use your herbs to help Neville," Remus stated plainly.

'He's stealing from you,' the voice said.

"Why would I want to help that kid out?  He's hopeless!"  His breath hitched, but he lowered his wand.

"You want to help him because you want to help train the new wave of fighters against Voldemort."

Even with his breath hitching, Severus gave him a skeptical look.

"Fine!  Then it's because it's important to me, and you want to help me," Remus cried, desperately. 

"Hesshum!  Hek-Kesshump!"  Severus leaned against the wall, and felt sweat slip down his forehead.  Before he could ask for help, Remus was by his side.

"Come on Severus," he said, leading him back to the bedroom.  "Are you hungry?"

"A bit."  He sniffed.  He was losing his appetite fast.

Remus smiled.  "Good, I'll make you Lily's Chicken Noodle Soup."

'He's going to poison you,' the voice told him. Severus tried to brush it away, but it persisted.  'He's going to kill you when you're weak.  He's getting revenge on the death of the Potters.  You know better.  You are stronger than this.  Don't let your guard down.'  With that the voice was gone.

Severus almost drifted off at the table waiting for the soup to be finished.  But, finally, Remus brought him a steaming hot bowl of soup.

"What's in it?" Severus asked, eyeing the soup warily.

"Carrots, celery, onions broth, chicken, noodles, oregano, bay leaves, basil, and thyme," Remus answered, bringing his own bowl of soup to the table.

Severus brought his handkerchief to his face.  "Heh-Ketchum!  Hasshum!  Eh-hah-Shump!"

"Bless you," Remus said, trying not to draw any more attention to Severus' ailment than necessary.

Severus blew his nose with a congested honk, then mumbled a tired thank you.  He sipped the soup, tasting it for any other added ingredients.  Salt.  "It's salty," he said.

"Oh, yes, and I added salt," Remus said, taking a spoonful of his.

Severus plunked his spoon down.  "You're trying to kill me," he said with the upmost certainty.

Remus was aghast.  "I am not."

"You are.  Salt.  You forgot to mention salt.  So many poisons make things taste salty.  I refuse to eat it.  I can't believe I allowed you – a werewolf – into my suites.  I must have been mad.  You've been trying to kill me this whole time.  In fact, you're probably what made me sick in the first place."  Then, under his breath, he added, "Filthy mongrel."

Remus' breath got caught in his chest.  He felt as if Severus had slapped him.  Certainly, he couldn't have meant it. "Just eat it, Sev.  It's good for you."  He took a spoonful of his own soup and let the warmth and the taste fill him.

Severus looked at him coldly.  The pain in Remus' eyes stabbed his heart like a knife.  'I'm sorry', he thought.  But, he couldn't bring himself to say it.  Remus had to know he didn't mean it.

'Serves him right,' the voice said.  'Filthy beast.  He's not clean.  He should not be sharing your table...let alone your bed.'

"Rem, maybe you should sleep in your own room tonight," Severus heard himself say.  It was the last thing he wanted, but he couldn't stop himself from saying it.

"I think I'll stay," Remus said.

With strength and speed he didn't know he possessed, Severus moved to Remus, grabbed the man by his teachers robes, and shoved him against the wall.  "You filthy beast!" he shouted.  "I'll not have you in my home anymore.  You are not welcome here.  Now go!" And with that he threw Remus towards the door.

Remus hit the floor with a thump, and his head met with the metal door with a clang.  His head throbbed, as did his hips and back.  He wanted to argue, but everything hurt too much.  As it was, he wasn't sure if he would be able to make it out of the dungeon without help.  He was afraid to try to withstand another attack.  Slowly, very slowly, he worked on getting to his feet.

Severus watched his lover and friend get to his feet.  He wanted to cry, beg for forgiveness, or at least help him to his feet.  But, the voice had been correct.  He had been too weak, too vulnerable as of late.  He had to put Remus in his place.  With a heavy sigh, he watched Remus walk stiffly out the door.

"So, if I put the gilly flower – not the gilly weed- with the unicorn hair, it helps make the ever lasting glow rod, but not the light stick?" Neville asked.

Remus wasn't listening.  He was hurt, not just physically, but emotionally as well.  He wanted to cry.  But, he told Neville that he'd help him, so he was working at it. Sort of.

"Remus?"  Neville asked.

Remus turned his eyes to him. 

"Remus, are you all right?"

He wanted to say no, and tell him what was wrong.  But, it wasn't Neville's problem to deal with his issues.  And, it wasn't his right to lay them on him.

"Nothing."

"No offense, sir, but you're lying."

Remus smiled and nodded.

"So, sir," Neville said, putting aside the herbs, "let's try that again."

"It's all right, Neville.  But, thank you for your concern," Remus said, patting his hand.

"No sir." He thought for a moment, then followed up with, "It's Professor Snape isn't it?"

Remus nodded.

Neville nodded, and then added, "I know he's ill.  Is he acting oddly?"

"Yes, but how did you know?" Remus asked.

"Sir, you... you know what happened to my parents?"

Remus nodded.  There wasn't a survivor from the last war alive who didn't know what happened to his parents.

"Then let me tell you a secret: they still hear him, you know."

"Severus?"

"No, Voldemort.  They still hear his snake like hiss, telling them to do things. They still hear him giving commands.  It haunts their nightmares, and –according to the doctors at St. Mungos – that's why they don't improve.  They're spending what little they have on defeating the memory echo that they don't have the strength to pull out of it.  Maybe Professor Snape is going through the same type of thing."

Remus thought about it.  It would explain so much.  He looked at the clock and then at the door. 

"Go, ahead," Neville said.  "I'll clean up."

Remus smiled, quickly getting out of his chair.  "Thank you, Neville."  And, with that, he was out the door.

Severus slept fitfully.  No sooner had he asked Remus to leave, than the other voice and self-doubt left as well.  His head pounded, and his nose tickled fiercely.  He felt like he was going insane, and wanted nothing more than to hold Remus close and say he was sorry. 

Suddenly, there was a cool cloth on his head. "Lucius?" he whispered.

"Not even close."

"Remus." The corners of his mouth drew up in a smile.  "You came back."

"I got some insight from a friend, who told me you may still need me."

Severus coughed roughly.  "Thank you for coming back."

"You're welcome.  Can I come to bed?"

Exhausted, Severus held out an arm to him.  "I can't sleep," he said, as Remus snuggled into him.

Remus smiled.  "That's okay.  I'm here. You're safe.  The past is the past, and we are the future.  Just rest easy, I will hold you."  The words were said quietly – barely above a whisper.  But they meant that things were going to be okay, just as long as Remus took the time to get to know him.