Beat By A Long Shot

"They says that spring is for lovers; but I think winter has it beat by a long shot." James drawled in remembrance to his friends.

"Well, you would say that." Remus pointed out; "I mean after all that's when-"

"Prongs, ol' boy finally captured his love's heaaart," Sirius interrupted slurring the last word.

"Padfoot," Remus started.

"Heh-ETCHOO!"

The random sneeze echoed through the Hog's Head.

"Mmmm...just like that..." Sirius said gulping more Fire Whiskey.

"Just like that..." James agreed slurring his words a tiny bit too.

"Just like what?"

"Frank!" Remus exclaimed jumping to his feet to shake Frank Longbottom's hand warmly; "How's your wife? Did you know James here's getting married tomorrow?"

Frank looked over at James with surprise; "No, I had no idea, so what's he doing here at a bar the evening before his big day?"

"Oh, you know drinking away his nerves." Remus answered; "Sort of throwing himself a bachelor's party-to a degree I guess-we just came along for the ride... or in Sirius's case the liquor."

"Isn't that so," Frank responded gazing down at Sirius who had just slumped forward onto the table; "Looks like he over indulged in that area, eh?"

Remus made a noise between agreement and disgust; "Too true,"

"So what were you guys going on about before?" Frank inquired; "Something about just like that... ?"

"Oh, James was taking a stroll back to the good old days." Remus replied evasively.

"Really?" Frank said interest piqued. The Marauder's were known for never having a dull day. "And which days was he wondering back to?"

"Oh, you know the usual," Remus answered, but when it appeared Frank really didn't he continued; "The day he got Lily to go out with him?"

"Ah yes," Frank responded enthusiastically; "I've heard tales of how it happened, but I've never really heard the story out of the horse's mouth..." He trailed off suggestively.

"Can't imagine why," Remus replied then lowered his voice and leaned closer to Frank; "Seeing as we're all in the Order... plenty of time tell it there... and he has-about several dozen times it feels like."

James who had been staring into his bottle of Fire Whiskey sighed. His sigh was full of recollection, and content.

"He must really like her," Frank commented watching James.

"Of course he does," Remus said sensibly; "You don't ask just anyone to marry you, do you?"

"No," Frank agreed; "You certainly don't."

Suddenly, James seemed to come back from his dreams of past days, or perhaps he'd finished browsing through them.

"Frank!" James greeted jovially. His trip to the past seemed to have had a sobering effect on him; "How's your job going?"

"Fine, fine," Frank answered waving the question away as if it wasn't important; "I hear you're getting married tomorrow."

"Yeah," James said a mix of emotions flittering across his face.

"So would you mind telling me about the day you finally achieved your seemingly impossible goal that has led to your good fortune today?" Frank asked with a wide grin.

"Oh no..." Remus moaned (though no one was listening to him) covering his face with one of his hands; "Now you've done it... and it takes him a good half hour at least to tell it..."

However, James's grin was even wider than Frank's when he gave a reply; "Suuure... you know how they say spring is for lovers? Well, I think winter has it beat by a long shot..."

"Lily," James whined; "It's so cold."

`I know,' Lily thought; `I've heard this how many times today? Ten? Twenty? Fifty?'

"Lileee," James wailed dragging out the last sound on her name.

"What?"

"I'm cold!" James complained; "I'm frozen! I think I may be suffering from frostbite!"

"Good," Lily snapped; "Then maybe I can cut out your tongue by the time we reach the castle."

"What?" James asked horrified-he wasn't THAT cold.

"You know cut out your tongue because your tongue's ailing from frostbite." Lily replied slowly as if it needed to be said so to penetrate his brain.

"Hey, I never said my TONGUE had frostbite, and I only said I MAY." James retorted indignantly.

"Well, your tongue will be suffering from something if you don't stop complaining." Lily snipped.

James grunted, annoyed. Here she was pushing him away... couldn't she see he had changed... grown up... become more mature?

There was maybe two minutes of blissful silence, before James began his tirade... again.

"Lily, I'm REALLY cold! Why aren't you cold?"

"James," Lily sighed; "I've already explained this to you..."

"Oh right!" James said as though he'd only just remembered; "You live in Wick! Pray tell Lily, where the hell is WICK?! I mean who's heard of WICK!"

"James," Lily said exasperated; "I've told you that too."

"Oh have you?" James challenged fighting to keep a straight face-it was so difficult with Lily...

"Yes, James, I have!" Lily answered her voice beginning to get louder.

"Really," James responded with an air of question; "Then how come I don't know where it is!"

"Really, James," Lily began her eyes starting to flash dangerously; "I've told you at least twice when we've had this very same argument! I live in Wick! It's a tiny place towards the tip of Scotland. I am used to the cold because it is cold there. Are you happy now?"

"No," James replied a cheeky grin spreading across his face; "I still don't know where you live, or why you're so used to the cold... or why I'm so cold and you're not doing anything about it."

"James," Lily growled; "This is not a good time..."

They were flirting, and Lily hadn't even realized it. She had realized, however, that she was getting to the I'm-about-to- explode-any-minute range with her anger. It was also too late to try to sooth it... this was not a pity.

"When is a good time then?" James asked his eyes lighting up with a sudden idea; "How about when you're in the shower?"

"James!" Lily yelped.

"Come on Lily," James begged; "Please do something... I'm cold! I hate being cold! I hate it, I hate it, I hate it! Isn't there a spell or something you could use? What do you do? Should I wet my pants?"

"What?" Lily questioned outraged; "Wet your pants? I BEG your pardon? Did I hear you correctly?"

"Yup," James said and announced his reasoning; "That's why people like you smell... isn't it?"

`That was it!' Lily thought as her anger burst forth in a shove.

Yes, she shoved James, and, he, caught off guard careened over backwards and into the Hogwarts Lake. Now, THAT was cold.

Lily watched as he came to the surface wearing a surprised look on his face. She glared at him and unnecessarily informed him; "Now, THAT is what I would call COLD..."

She left him then-still shocked that he had been pushed into the lake.

Though, as she flounced off, and was disappearing quickly into the distance she swore she heard him call: "IT WAS ONLY A JOKE LILY! AW, COME ON! LILY... Lily!"

She paid no heed to him though.

"Padfoot, stop laughing..." James snapped; "Padfoot! I said STOP IT!"

"S-s-s-sorry James... I just can't help myself!" Sirius answered before bursting into more peals of laughter.

A sudden shiver crawled up James's spine. They'd been happening quite a lot since he'd dragged his pitiful form from the water. His fingers felt like ice...

"AH!" Sirius cried; "AH! AH! COLD! COLD!"

"You won't laugh anym-m-m-m-more..." James asked as another shiver gripped him.

"No! No more!" Sirius agreed quickly; "JUST GET YOUR HANDS OFF OF ME!"

James removed his hands feeling that his friend would not be terrorizing him anymore; "Good, boy, I certainly agree with Lily's sense of cold! I'm an icicle!"

"Definitely wouldn't want to cross her!" Sirius nodded; "What did you do?"

"Oh, I was just joking about her wetting her pants to keep warm... nothing big." James shrugged.

"Nothing big!" Sirius exclaimed; "Where is your head when you're with her?"

"I dunno?" James replied rubbing a towel on his wet hair; "Up in the clouds?"

"Must be," Sirius smirked; "Otherwise you never would've said something like that! Aw man, that's horrible!"

"Hey!" James said; "What exactly's so horrible!"

"Well... for starters-" Sirius began.

"Forget it," James laughed; "I don't want to hear it! Anyway, I think I'm going to go crawl into bed, and try to warm up..."

"You do that Prongs," Sirius replied waving him off to bed; "You certainly look like you could use it... pushing you into the lake! Who would've thought!"

There she was... as beautiful as her name implied... his Lily... James approached her, and she smiled with a nod beckoning him closer... and he came overcome by her radiant beauty and charm... he neared her and cautiously put his arms around her... he was about to kiss her when there was a sudden, unexpected earthquake... Lily shattered, and James fell...

Yes, James fell-onto the floor... curtsey of two of his friends, Sirius Black, and Remus Lupin.

James groaned; "Aw come on guys! I was having a really good dream!"

"We know," Sirius said with a grin; "We heard you... Lily! Lily! Come kiss me!" He taunted, and James lunged at him.

"James, really, though-we came to get you for dinner." Remus explained.

James got off Sirius; "Well, in that case I suppose I can forgive you guys. Where's Wormtail?"

"We figure he went to dinner without us." Sirius replied putting on a big, fake pout; "I can't say I don't agree with him either... if Remus here hadn't reminded me you were my best friend I wouldn't have come helped him wake you up, but since it was you..."

"Shut up, Padfoot!"

"Yes, yes, let's go get some of that dinner we're talking about!" Sirius boomed jumping to his feet with what seemed to be everlasting energy.

As they left the dormitories and out the portrait hole Sirius could be heard asking what WAS for dinner.

"Fish," Remus had replied around a grin; "Your favorite."

"Aw," Sirius had moaned; "That's a cat's dinner... a McGonagall dinner... I bet she had a part in what they're serving tonight!"

"Padfoot!"

However, when the group did reach dinner James found he wasn't actually that hungry.

Despite this he still placed a chunk of fish on his plate, and a pile of a mixture of vegetables. He then proceeded to slowly pick at them, staring down the table at the person who he had been dreaming about. James sighed with longing... if only she would go out with him...

"James!" Remus cried; "Watch out!"

"What?" James wondered gaze still down the table. "Why wasn't there any pumpkin juice in his mouth? He had lifted his cup; hadn't he? Oh no!

"I am so sorry Remus." James spluttered twisting around to assess the damage he'd done to his friend. Unfortunately James hit his plate in his hurry sending it too into Remus's lap.

"Oh God," James apologized; "I really am sorry."

The werewolf's eyes were burning and a scowl tugged at his lower countenance.

"Ah, Remus," Sirius grinned; "You know James his mind is busy taking in the red head at the end of the table."

Remus's scowl deepened, but lessened when James suddenly turned away to sneeze.

"Huh-UH-Choo! Heh-Etchoo! Ecktchoo!"

He turned back to his friends sniffling; "Sorry,"

Remus gave him a look, and then surprisingly smiled; "Well, my mouth isn't exactly located down there James... hey, I forgive you."

James smiled back at him while rubbing his nose; "Thank you Remus. Now I think I'll be going to go finish my homework up in bed where there aren't any distractions for me."

James did climb into bed to finish his homework, but there two reasons behind him: he really didn't want any distractions, and he was still feeling cold.

However, there is a reason why many people chose not to work in their beds. You see a bed is a rather comfy, relaxing spot, so instead to getting any homework finished James found himself floating off to dreamland only half an hour in.

It was just so lovely and warm there though... he was tired too... but he had homework... homework... due next day too... so tired...

The door burst open at ten thirty that night. Loud laughter crackled through the room to wake the sleeping James.

"Heh-huh-ha-Chushhh! Heh-EH-Tchoo! Tchoo! Ah-Chihhh!"

The laughter slowed, and finally halted; "James?"

James yawned; "Yeah?"

God, his head was pounding...

"You nearly finished?"

"Finished?" James questioned confused; "Finished what?"

"Your homework!"

"What?" James asked.

A head poked in through the drapes surrounding his bed. It was Sirius.

"Oh God," Sirius laughed; "You should look at your face!"

"What?" James said slowly. The noise was making his headache worse...

"Hey, Remus!" Sirius called; "Come and take a look at James!"

Another head belonging to Remus emerged from the room. When he saw James he grinned amusedly.

"You've got ink all over yourself!" Remus commented before chuckling.

James groaned; "Can you guys stop that?"

"Stop what?" Remus asked still grinning.

"Stop being so loud!" James burst out. Then hastily explained at the shocked faces; "I have a headache bigger than Russia!"

"Oh," Remus said intelligently; "What about your homework?"

That's when it clicked: his homework! It was due tomorrow, and he still had a Potions essay, Transfiguration project, and an Ancient Runes chart to finish. Also, he acknowledged looking down at what used to be a Charms essay, he now had to redo his Charms homework... oh, what a glorious night it was!

"James," Sirius inquired waving a hand in front of his friend's face; "Are you there man?"

James was shaken back to reality; "My hooomewooork!"

Remus and Sirius exchanged bewildered glances. What was he on about?

"I can't believe it!" James moaned; "It's all due tomorrow! What am I going to do! I've still got Potions, Transfiguration, and Ancient Runes! My Charms essay is ruined, and-and-I-Heh-Tchoo! Heh-AT- Chuhhh! Choo! Oh, my head..."

Remus and Sirius gazed down at the pitiful site of ink, parchment, text books, blankets, and James cradling his head.

"Hat-Cheshhh!"

A sneaky sneeze snuck up on James, and what was left in his ink bottle fell over his bed sheets and parchment-then leaked into his Transfiguration text. James looked like he was at a breaking point.

"James," Remus said gently; "Maybe you should go to sleep... it might do you some good-"

"Ohhh, but I can't Remus!" James sighed; "That's just what I was doing! I don't have anything done now... and I don't know what-Ah!"

James seized his head as a particularly sharp pain exploded inside, and began to rock.

"James as your best friend and all..." Sirius started seriously; "I think we better get something for that headache of yours."

Remus lit up with the idea; "Yes, Prongs, it might make you think clearer."

James looked up hopefully at them with a weak smile; "You think so?"

"Yeah," they agreed simultaneously.

"Okay," James agreed calming down at prospect of getting ride of his headache.

"I know something that'll do wonders for you... I think." Remus said as James clambered out of bed eager to be rid of the dreadful ache in his head.

James rubbed tiredly at his eyes later that night, or should I say early the next morning. He had gotten rid of his headache, and was now finishing up his last piece of homework: the Ancient Runes chart. He longed to go to sleep, but knew he had to finish- especially as he was Head Boy. He had to set a good example for younger students.

"Heh-huh-huh-Eshoo! Het-Tchoo!"

James sniffed and rubbed a finger under his nose. He HAD to finish this.

"Hah-Chushhh!"

He was nearly done after all...

"Ah-HET-CHUHHH!"

James growled scrubbing at his irritated nose. He only had five more slots to fill in...

"Hetchhh! Ah-Hetchoo!"

Giving up as fatigue pulled on his eyes and his nose streamed James half heartedly filled the remaining slots. Shoving all his work into his bag he straightened and stumbled toward the dormitory giving a final sneeze as he worked his way up the stairs.

"Heh-Ashoo!"

A fresh bed awaited him made up neatly-he smiled slightly... he loved his friends.

Rather unluckily for James the next morning was a school day, Friday, but still... he moaned as the drapes around his bed were tugged open at a bright and early hour of eight.

"Goooood morning James!" Sirius sang; "It is the lovely hour of eight... and if you don't get out of bed right now Remus and I are taking you down to the hospital wing... now, hurry up-we've brought you breakfast, buuuuut if you don't get ready now you'll be late for classes... we all know that wouldn't go over well."

James squinted up at the overly cheery Sirius then putting a hand to his temple he asked; "Do you happen to have anymore of that stuff you gave me?"

"Remus?" Sirius called over his shoulder; "The young man in bed has a question for you!"

When Remus appeared James repeated his question slowly working his fingers in circles on his temples.

"Go get a shower, and get dressed." Remus said at first; "I'll dig some more out for you..."

Ten minutes later James had scarfed the muffin down, and drained the goblet of juice Sirius had brought him-as well as having a shower and getting dressed. Now, he was slowly packing his bag and steadily using up a tissue box.

"Hah-ATSCHOO! Heh-Tchoo! Huh-Chuhhh!"

"Okay James," Remus managed to get out before he was jumped upon by an excited James.

"You've got it?" James asked eagerly.

"Yes, yes," Remus laughed; "I do, but if you don't stop jumping around I'll spill it."

James immediately stopped badgering his friend.

"Good, here you go."

James quickly poured it in his mouth before the smell could convince him otherwise. Gulping thickly, James went coughing for a goblet of water, but one was thrust in his face as he stumbled around the room.

When he had managed to swallow all the dreadful concotion James thanked them before exploding with a fury of sneezes.

"Huh-UH-SHIHHH! Ah-TCHOO! Choo! Heh-CHUHHHHH!"

"Here," Remus said throwing the tissue box at him; "You better take these to class with you."

"I'll pack the rest of your bag up for you James," Sirius grinned; "But only this once..."

James grinned slightly to his friends. They were so caring; "Thanks guys."

"No problem, right Remus?" Sirius replied, and Remus nodded; "Right!"

Remus glanced down at his watch; "It's almost time get to class... we better go."

James and Sirius agreed. Transfiguration was their first class, and as everyone knows she was the strictest professor for miles around...

Other than being slightly late for Transfiguration and losing thirty points from the house all together James found he sneezed himself through all the classes rather smoothly. He noticed Lily staring at him several times that day after a bout of sneezes. He wondered why, but couldn't muster up enough care to ask her.

It was now later than evening, and dinner had passed. The sun was setting and James was tired. However, whenever he attempted to fall asleep he'd always be shaken awake by a sneeze or two... after an hour of this he had given up, and then devoted himself to finding the Room of Requirement.

It had been moved from last year, and James longed for its soothing comfort. Under the safety of his invisibility cloak James set off.

He hadn't gone far when he saw a flash of red hair turn a corner. Intrigued, James followed.

It turned out to be Lily Evans, who appeared to be out for a late night stroll around the castle.

"Where is it, where is it," Lily muttered distractedly to herself; "It was somewhere around here last time!"

A sudden prickling in his nasal passages warned James of an on coming sneeze, but it had already progressed too far for him to squelch it. Instead, he griped his nose and bobbed his head.

Yes, that was all it was a single head bob then the release of air. It was this release that unfortunately gave his presence away.

Lily stopped muttering to herself and gazed carefully around the corridor. Then just when he thought Lily had guessed it was him, she surprised him.

"Ah hah!" Lily cried triumphantly; "That's where it was!"

With those words said she began to pace in front of a suit of armor that was wearing a top hat. Her eyes were squeezed shut as she paced... one... two...

"Hah-CHESHHH!"

`Goodness,' James thought; "If that doesn't tell her who I am then nothing will... '

Lily was finishing her final lap when she heard a loud sneeze off to her right... Potter.

Hoping to escape James before he could find her, Lily shoved the suit of armor out of the way and opened the door that had appeared behind it.

James watched and sniffled as he watched her disappear out of sight into a wall. He came closer for an inspection and realized wasn't really a wall but the Room of Requirement!

Excitement overcame James and tugged the door roughly open. An expression of pure bliss set upon his face at the prospect of finding the Room of Requirement... or rather Lily finding it for him.

"Lily," James greeted happily; "I never knew you knew about this room!"

Lily smiled halfheartedly at him; "Well, I do."

"Indeed you do!" James affirmed then taking a closer look about the room he responded incredulously; "You like half a box of tissues?!"

"Oh, they're just there `cause you sneezed and distracted me from my image of how I wanted the room to be." Lily explained.

"Aw, you thought of me when you heard me sneeze?" James asked acting touched-which he really was just not so much so.

Lily growled at him then went over to the goblet and pitch on the window sill. She poured herself a goblet full.

Taking a drink she spluttered..."Apparently you also affected my pumpkin juice!"

James grinned; "What is it then? Orange juice?"

"As a matter of fact it is!" Lily informed him passing the goblet over to him she continued; "Here, you finish it!"

James accepted, but hurriedly pushed it back at her.

"Heh-Chuhhh! Huh-Tchoo!"

"James you really should be in bed..." Lily said sympathetically; "I'm sorry for pushing you into that lake..."

"No wor-heh-worries... Het-Choo!" James answered around a sneeze.

"James," Lily spoke in almost a whisper; "Go lie down on that bed over there."

Sniffing miserably James nodded; "Hat-Tchoo!"

Lily noticed James making no move to go to the suggested place, so she wrapped an arm around his waist and guided her there; "Go to sleep. It's Saturday tomorrow-nothing important to do on Saturday's right? You can sleep here as long as you like..."

"Lily," James asked as he crawled beneath the covers; "Would you stay with me?"

Lily opened her mouth; then blinked and shut it again.

"Please?" James begged; "I'll be lonely..."

"Well, I suppose..." Lily agreed warming up to the idea a bit; "It's so cold in our dorm I never want to sleep there anyway... so what's the harm?"

James made a sleepy sound; "Lily?"

"Yes?" Lily inquired.

"I've just got one more question for you... will you please go out with me?" James questioned, and before she could say no he continued; "I know you don't like what my friends and I do to the Slytherins, soooo if we lay off will you?"

Lily thought about it a while; "I suppose we could give it a try, but you only get one... consider it your Christmas present."

"Oh yeah," James mumbled already heading off into a world of dreams; "That's the day after tomorrow yawn isn't it?"

"Yes, James now go to sleep..."

James didn't need to be told twice he was already drifting off to a and of green eyes and red hair...

"The rest of it's history..." James finished.

"Wow," Frank said amazed; "All you had to do was tell her you'd stop pranking the Slytherins?"

"Yeah, and she was all soft because I had a cold from the shove she gave me into the lake... Merlin's Beard! Is that the time?!" James cried jumping to him feet, and prodding Remus awake who'd fallen asleep during James's story.

"Yup," Frank confirmed; "I'd best be going."

"Yeah, us too!" James replied as he and Remus force fed Sirius a sobering potion; "It sure was nice taking that walk with you down memory lane!"

As Frank waved good bye James reminded him; "And don't forget-spring isn't a time for lovers! It's winter! It beats it by a LONG shot!"